It happened again. It was a beautiful, sunny, perfect day. I was relaxed and at rest on the couch and having a conversation with a great friend. And it happened… again.
The conversation that morning began light and fun. But it took a subtle turn as the conversation drifted into deeper water (difficult issues about life and struggles and people). I began drifting into an all too familiar self-righteousness, a “Holier than thou” way of thinking.
You’ve seen this happen… some people make it sound better, calling it a “soapbox”. It usually occurs when someone feels like they have a certain thing “figured out”, nailed, are living it well, and so they begin to “tell it like it is.” Unaware, intentionally or not, they begin to look down on and minimize those who don’t have it figured out, who aren’t living it as well, who aren’t doing it ‘right’.
I get like this sometimes. I boil down complex issues to a single sentence, a simple tip, technique, or bit of advice. “If they had only done x, y, and z. this wouldn’t have happened!” “Don’t they know the bible says xyz about that?!” “They are just messed up.” “They brought it upon themselves!” “All you gotta do is…” And on it goes.
I might have gone along unaware of myself and my impact, until when, with feet planted firmly on my soapbox from which I’m expertly diagnosing and solving yet another of the world’s problems, I’m stopped dead in my tracks — utterly halted by a simple, loving act.
A Mirror. My friend held up a mirror. And in it I saw a glimpse of the fruit that is my life.
My life wasn’t bearing the fruit I hoped it would. Continue reading “Fruit And Mirrors (The Benefits of Checking Your Blind-Spots)”
It was a rainy day in October when a few of us got together–old friends reconnecting. We talked about our past, our present, and our future. There were some awkward pauses… but we listened to each other. We spoke of our hopes and desires for the future. We wondered together about life and community and the intersections of our lives. We left each other with the plan to get together again soon. It was a really good conversation… but still I left with something nagging me… like the feeling you get when you can’t remember something but its right on the “tip of your tongue”… like there was something just outside of my conscious senses that I couldn’t quite put my finger on.
Reminded… Continue reading “Are You Living In A Spiritual Zoo?”
Dealing with the Poser
Well, its been a while since my last post in which I asked you to note your responses to a few things in your life. So pull out those notes. How did it go? Did any patterns emerge? Any new ideas spring to the forefront? It can be tough to connect the dots in day-to-day living of all that impacts our freedom. That’s why we paused to take note of a few specific things. To be honest, I pause like this far too little. But, I want to live with freedom. (And I’m assuming you do, too.)
In the last couple of posts (Pt 1 and Pt 2) I’ve been writing about the impact on our lives of both being real and when we “pose”. And just so we’re all clear… I believe we all pose. Yes, all. I’m hoping that you’re beginning to recognize it after the last couple of blog posts. So today I want to tackle the underlying question, Why?! Why do we pose? And more importantly, what do we do about it? Continue reading “Dealing with the Poser & The Freedom of Being Real (Part 3)”